Blogging A – Z Challenge 2021: L Is For Lunchtime Labels

Herb’s Blog, Herbdate 22349 – 814:

Here’s the haps:

So this is the kind of silliness that makes me want to laugh out loud so maniacally and so hard that people fear and dogs and little children start to whine. “Mommy, why is that man banging his head so hard against that wall?” “Come away, little Johnny, the man is disturbed.” Not just disturbed, little Johnny but completely bonkers. The man who cringes at repetitious redundancies over and over again; the man who makes noises when people say things like ATM Machine, or as someone pointed out, the VIN number on their car; that same man had these for lunch the other day:

I can imagine you staring at me and saying, “Ummm…okaaayyy…Herb…Fish is good for you. Glad to see you’re having a healthy lunch. Good job.” Oh yes. And tasty, as well. I enjoy these and sardines as well. I’ve not made a major announcement to the whole world (except I guess I am just now) but my family has put me on a calorie-counting thing and the app I have been using (and a couple of other apps, also) has a barcode scanner and makes adding things into your food diary a simple thing. I’m actually quite pleased with my discipline and at some point I will tell you more about it all. One of the things it has gotten me to do, however, is read labels. Here in the USA the Food and Drug administration governs the labeling of foods to show all the ingredients in order of amount of each item, nutrition facts, calorie counts, serving sizes and warnings about potential, known allergens. This is, of course all fine and dandy, even, I think, necessary. It is also silly. Witness the other side of this can:

The first ingredient is herring fillets, which means that’s the major item in there. Then, in bold letters, the warning:

Contains: Herring

well, no kidding, Mr. Holmes. I went and looked in the cupboard and pulled out a can with a pretty blue label that said Mackerel.

And do you know what it said?

My lunch a few days later (actually I don’t eat as much fish as appears in this post but I do love me some sardines or some herring) sported this fancy label:

And actually, the part about crustaceans may be very important. If you’ve ever seen someone have a severe reaction to anything you know that it can be a matter of life or death. But come on, it just said the main ingredients are Sardines and SOYbean oil so maybe, it might be a stretch of the imagination, but just maybe, it contains sardines and soy.

The one that really drives me bats, the one that makes me want to scream and bang my head on the wall, the one that really pushes my buttons when it comes to this subject is one of my favorite breakfast cereals. Started in 1902 and even touted by the American movie cowboy, known for his good and honest nature (he did wear a white hat), Tom Mix and his horse, Tony during the Forties. Ralston Wheat Cereal. 100% milled wheat is the only ingredient.